Personal Development

Life Did WHAT?? Gaining Control Of Your Emotions

As busy SuperWAHMs, I’m sure there’s been a moment or two in your life where things just feel out of control. Perhaps something in your business, your relationship, your kids, your work…. Can you relate? We’ve all been there!

The fact is, there are many things that happen to all of us each and every day that we have absolutely NO control over. Your plane’s been delayed, your internet’s not working, the economy’s taking a turn. Things can change whether we want them to or not, and sometimes we just have no control over that. But what we DO have control over is our emotions. And the impact of any outside situation in your life depends on how you personally react or respond to it.

“Life is 10% what happens to me, and 90% of how I react to it” – Chuck Swindoll

Taking control of your emotions is key when it comes to the quality of your life, and even the success of your business. It can mean the difference between the failure and success, and whether you can reach that ultimate version of you.

Here are 3 top tips to gaining control over your emotions, and taking control over how you react to challenging situations.

TIP ONE: HOLD YOUR TONGUE

Ever been in a situation where you’ve been completely fired up?! And in that moment, have you ever said something you maybe wish you didn’t say? Or react in a way you wish you didn’t react? Did it help relieve that situation, or did it fuel it?

When you react in an emotional state, you’re actually taking a minor situation and turning into a mountain. By taking a moment, holding your tongue, and really assessing what’s ACTUALY going on, then you’re more likely to respond in a way that is much more meaningful and appropriate.

I personally love meditation to help with this. It really allows you to remain in a coherent state when your emotions or stress levels are typically running high. However, I want to put it out there now – mediation is NOT a quick-fix. It does work wonders, but must be done regularly to really make a difference. I personally practice this as part of my daily routine.

TIP TWO: CHECK-IN

So meditation is great right! But when you’re in that moment of high stress or emotion, it’s not like you can say “excuse me – I’ll be back in an hour. Just need to go meditate on this!” Sure, you can certainly meditate on this issue as part of an ongoing process (and I certainly recommend this!), but what can you do RIGHT NOW in this moment when emotions are running high?

Simply put – take a second to ‘check-in’ with yourself. Ask yourself some important questions:

  • Is this thought or emotion actually true?
  • Does it apply to the situation?
  • Is this thought empowering me?

You want to listen to the thoughts and emotions that are actually serving you and helping you through the situation. By seeing those thoughts for what they really are (a.k.a. rubbish!) they lose their power.

At the end of the day – if you’re ok, you’re still breathing, your heart’s still beating, your mind’s still working – well then you really ARE ok right now, and things will work themselves out. When you keep this in mind, you will find yourself much more grounded in the decisions you make and how you will react.

TIP THREE: IT’S ALL IN THE ATTITUDE

Whether it’s raining on your wedding day, you’re stuck in a traffic jam, or you’re experiencing that all-elusive tech trouble, just remember this all-important phrase “It always works out for me.”.

Quite frankly, unless something’s completely heart-breaking or a tragedy-level event, then there IS always a way around it. But to work your way around this, then you must have a way to re-frame what’s actually going on in your head.

Saying the above mantra whenever you’re faced with a challenging situation will actually train your brain to look for the solution, rather than stay bogged down in the emotion. Why is this important? Because you are training your brain to remain in complete control over that particular situation.

So remember – life happens! You can let it overpower you, OR you can decide what your attitude will be. The power is the CHOICE of the attitude you adopt, and you have that wonderful choice each and every day of your life.

Calem and Jenn Koek

Calem & Jenn are award winning digital marketers, and are the founders of Elevate Websites in Melbourne. They are passionate about helping local businesses connect with their ideal audience, and personally mentor entrepreneurs in growing their home based business.